Elizabeth Warren AWOL from Senate

How long has it been since the fake Indian represented her adopted state of Massachusetts in the U.S. Senate?

Many, many moons.

How long since Fauxchahontas cast-um last roll-call vote in Senate?

Since buffalo roamed the plains. 

Actually, this isn’t such bad news for any taxpaying citizens of the Commonwealth, because she certainly wouldn’t be doing anything on our behalf. But still, she is making big wampum for doing nothing — $174,000 a year for what has become a no-show job.

Granted, this no-show m.o. of hers is nothing new, not since Lieawatha started checking the box, anyway, and began climbing out of the tank towns of academia into the Ivy League. At Harvard Law, she was grabbing $350,000 a year for teaching one course, plus she got the no-interest loan from Harvard to buy her multimillion-dollar wigwam on Linnean Street.

It was the least Harvard could do for its “first woman of color.”

This phenomenon was first noted Monday by Ira Stoll of Reason magazine, and it didn’t just start this month.

“She’s missed at least the past 23 votes in a row,” Stoll wrote, including four on Halloween. “According to GovTrak, she missed 70.2% of the votes from July through September 2019 and has missed 95.3% of the votes” since Oct. 1.

If any Republican ducked out on that many votes, his political career would be headed for the Happy Hunting Grounds. But she’s got those high cheekbones. It doesn’t matter how long she’s been off the reservation.

The fact is, the Senate always was a consolation prize for Fraudazuma. She wanted to run the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB), which is probably going to be declared unconstitutional by the Supreme Court.

But Fake-a-gawea was so obnoxious that no senators on either side of the aisle wanted her in a big job, so in 2012 she had to settle for running against Scott Brown, the accidental senator.

And ever since the fake Indian’s been in the Senate, she’s had only the barest interest in the job, although she did lie last year when she was running for a second term against Geoff Diehl, saying:

“I’ll serve my full Senate term if re-elected.”

Once again, she was speaking with a forked tongue.

It’s one thing to skip a few unimportant votes in the Senate. But some duties are required of anyone in public office, and she couldn’t even be bothered to attend the funeral Mass of Worcester Fire Lt. Jason Menard on Monday. Everybody else in state politics showed up — the governor, lieutenant governor and the AG. Ed Markey flew up from Maryland. His opponent, JoJoJo Kennedy, was likewise in attendance.

But not the fake Indian.

Now she’s got another big debate tonight, and her campaign’s in a bit of a stall, if not tailspin, since she released her fantasy “Medicare for All” scheme. That “plan” has turned out to be her own personal political Wounded Knee massacre, and now she’s saying she won’t be pushing it until the third year of her presidency — in other words, never.

I mean, do you think Obama could have gotten Obamacare passed in his third year as president? As disastrous as that fiasco was, Obama lost 63 seats in the House in 2010. How many House seats would the fake Indian lose in 2022 after totally wrecking health care in America — 163 maybe?

But it’s a moot point. She’ll never be president. If a Democrat does somehow oust Trump, Warren will definitely bail out of the Senate with an appointment. AG maybe — that would be bad. The Supreme Court — that would be worse, much worse.

But even if Trump wins, I don’t think she’ll stick around. Did Sarah Palin after her loss in 2008? Hell, Bob Dole resigned from the Senate when he was running for president. But then, he had some dignity, and respect for the institution.

In the meantime, let’s file a missing-persons report. Maybe she’s out on the campaign trail … of tears.

Check out Howie’s latest podcasts at howiecarrshow.com.