Where’s the Red Carpet?

It’s been a week now since the local Democrats publicly tried to guilt-trip their woke followers into opening up their $5 million suburban mansions for the Third World criminals flooding into the Commonwealth.

So far, the response of the very compassionate “Hate Has No Home Here” crowd seems to be somewhat underwhelming.

Has anyone seen a news single story anywhere about a machete-wielding neck-tattooed fentanyl dealer from El Salvador getting a warm Welcome Wagon greeting as he pulls up in his uninspected, uninsured, unregistered low rider in, say, Dover, or Brookline, or Cambridge?

Me neither.

I know all these fabulously wealthy Biden voters have plenty of room.

For instance, Gov. Maura Healey has a fourth bedroom in Arlington. You can check it out on Zillow.

As you know, she’s squatting in her fourth home over the last 20 months. The governor has set up a love nest with one of her former employees. Healey’s latest heart throb is 42 years old and used to work, uh, under 51-year-old Maura at the AG’s office.

It’s a May-December romance, God bless ‘em, and I’m sure this one will last longer than Maura’s last fling, which was also a May-December romance, only with Maura as May rather than December.

Anyway, the governor’s new gal pal owns a million-dollar suburban manse with four bedrooms. She’s got two children with her estranged husband. Give each of the kids their own bedroom and the lovebirds can share their own… bridal suite, as it were.

And that leaves one spare bedroom, or suite, as the lieutenant governor would say.

Perhaps Maura, Kim and all the rest of the virtue-signaling moonbat grandees don’t know how to find their own new undocumented Democrat roommates. But the illegals are out there, if you know where to look – which is in the jails and in the police reports.

Here’s my first nomination for Maura Healey’s new roommate. It comes from a Boston Police Department report, from Mass & Cass a week or so ago.

The cops saw two males go behind a green tent and then a male “later identified as Dieusemete Exavier DOB 08/08/81,” came out from the tent. The cops stopped him, despite “a language barrier.”

A bilingual cop was brought in and he informed “Exavier, in Haitian Creole, that a drug investigation was being conducted.”

The Haitian then confessed that he had bought $10 worth of crack cocaine from the local (American) drug dealer. Cops discovered the American in his tent with a cache of drugs as well as a woman cops identified as “Zvekic Amera.”

My guess is that Disuesemete Exavier would love to relocate from Roxbury to Arlington, where he could bunk in the governor’s posh new digs. Ditto Zvekic Amera.

Here’s another undocumented Democrat, an alleged Dominican drug dealer who I’m sure would like to relocate his one-man crime wave to a nice new suburban crime clubhouse.

Let’s call him Juan Doe, which is easier than listing all 18 aliases the Rhode Island State Police found for him after his arrest in a parking lot in Providence.

Governor, you won’t have to worry about Juan Doe eating you out of your casa – he has two phony EBT cards, from Rhode Island and New York. He also has a Rhode Island “Neighborhood Health Plan” card – Medicaid.

He’s been arrested seven times on drug offenses in New York and Rhode Island. He was busted recently in Providence with a woman who had a purse that only contained only “a large sum of American currency” — fat rubber-banded rolls of $100 and $50 bills.

Juan Doe was out on probation and is a bail violator.

He claimed to be a Puerto Rican, even though he had a Dominican accent and couldn’t remember the name of his hometown.

“In an attempt to access his knowledge of Puerto Rico,” the state cop wrote, “I asked John Doe how many stripes were on the Puerto Rican flag. John Doe replied, ‘A lot.’”

It’s hard to understand Democrats’ reluctance to open their hearts, not to mention their spare “suites” to these illegal alien criminals. Especially if the rich trust-funded types who blew in from out of state have children – young Josh and Mindy can absorb so many valuable lessons about so many different cultures from their new roommates living for free in America.

For instance, the future legacies at Harvard can learn the differences between dating, or courtships, between the First and Third World.

Last week we told you about a Venezuelan criminal named Jesus who allegedly raped a woman in front of her 3-year-old child in an illegal-alien flophouse in suburban Buffalo.

Now in the same hotel, a Congolese thug welcomed a local social worker into his taxpayer-paid hotel room. Then the African, by the name of Kindu Jeancy, raped the American.

Isn’t diversity wonderful?

Here’s another amigo looking for a new place to attack women and not have to worry about going to jail. In Magnolia Texas, one Jose Luis Contreras, age 22, was just arrested for trying to grab an 18-year-old American girl as she left a Target.

Meet Ahmed Snina, age 24. Until the last day or so, he used to loiter around Disneyworld in Orlando. According to police, Ahmed was recorded on video lurking around an unattended baby stroller at Epcot. He grabbed some car keys and soon was stealing a vehicle belonging to the American tourists.

Ahmed was just doing the auto smash-and-grabs that Americans can no longer be bothered doing.

Every day in every state the police are rounding up more and more of Joe Biden’s millions of undocumented Democrats. As Gov. Healey and Lt. Gov. Driscoll told us last week, these free-range beggars need places to crash.

Do you have a garage? It would make a nice place for them to stash all their stolen goods. How about a large tree in your backyard, that they could use as a target when they’re practicing throwing their machetes?

Filthy-rich Democrats, I can deliver as many of these foreign freeloading fiends as you want to put up. I find at least 10 a week just in the arrest blotters of the New Hampshire State Police.

The press releases of the US attorney’s office in Boston are also a remarkable resource for future residents of the state’s lily-white suburbs.

The next story you read about some rich Democrat bastard from Brookline turning his mansion into a Third World flophouse will be first.

Celebrate diversity – in somebody else’s neighborhood.

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