Grace’s Take: The #MeToo movement gets catty
If you haven’t been following the Aziz Ansari story, let me get you up to speed. Aziz is an actor best known for his roles in Parks and Rec and Master of None on Netflix.
His characters whether it be in TV or film, are always pretty similar. Likable, a tad bit quirky and awkward but always charming nonetheless.
So it came as a huge surprise when a woman who went by the pseudonym “Grace” accused the actor of taking advantage of her on a date.
I mean sure, if we’ve learned anything over the past few months, it is that Hollywood is a giant dumpster of depravity. So I guess saying “huge surprise” is a bit of a stretch. I was mildly caught off guard. Aziz seemed like one of the good guys.
But after reading more into the piece titled, I went on a date with Aziz Ansari…. It turned into the worst night of my life, it becomes obvious that the actor really received no clear signals or cues from this woman that anything was wrong. She did not say no or tell him to stop. While some feminists have stood by this accusation and called it an example of someone missing the signs of what non-consent looks like, many people were left with the same feeling on the story.
It was not rape. It was cringe-worthy. It was awkward. But rape…sexual assault even? It was not.
So Ashleigh Banfield, an anchor at HLN, took serious issue with this woman and I think she had some solid points. Take a look.
But the saga doesn’t end here. The woman who wrote the story, Katie Way, (she was not the woman in the story- merely the writer) proceeded to go after Banfield in a vicious email to the anchor after she was asked to appear on the show.
Business Insider printed the entirety of the email:
It’s an unequivocal no from me. The way your colleague Ashleigh (?), someone I’m certain no one under the age of 45 has ever heard of, by the way, ripped into my source directly was one of the lowest, most despicable things I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Shame on her. Shame on HLN. Ashleigh could have “talked” to me. She could have “talked” to my editor or my publication. But instead, she targeted a 23-year-old woman in one of the most vulnerable moments of her life, someone she’s never f—ing met before, for a little attention. I hope the ratings were worth it! I hope the ~500 RTs on the single news write-up made that burgundy lipstick bad highlights second-wave feminist has-been feel really relevant for a little while. She DISGUSTS me, and I hope when she has more distance from the moment she has enough of a conscience left to feel remotely ashamed — doubt it, but still. Must be nice to piggyback off of the fact that another woman was brave enough to speak up and add another dimension to the societal conversation about sexual assault. Grace wouldn’t know how that feels, because she struck out into this alone, because she’s the bravest person I’ve ever met. I would NEVER go on your network. I would never even watch your network. No woman my age would ever watch your network. I will remember this for the rest of my career — I’m 22 and so far, not too shabby! And I will laugh the day you fold. If you could let Ashleigh know I said this, and that she is no-holds-barred the reason, it’d be a real treat for me.
WOAH. It is one thing to attack a person’s facts or sources. But highlights? Burgundy lipstick? This chick has gone WAY too far. Once women start hating on each other’s aesthetics, that is a sure sign that no progress is being made. It is mean and below the belt. And honestly, I like burgundy. So go kick rocks Katie. I hope Babe.net goes out of business. Women don’t need to agree with women all the time. But we need to boost each other up. ESPECIALLY when it is about highlights. Finding the perfect hair color/ stylist is a life-long journey and shame on you for not realizing that.