Karen Read case theatre of the absurd, Act 1

It’s all in the hands of the jury now.

But as we await the verdict, think of all the bombshells we were promised by the corrupt Norfolk County prosecutors that somehow failed to materialize:

• Ring camera video from a neighbor’s house showed Karen Read killing her boyfriend John O’Keefe with her SUV. (Fake news broken by a local TV station, never retracted.)
• O’Keefe’s blood and DNA were found on the undercarriage of the SUV. (Attributed to “sources.”)
• Trooper Michael Proctor had zero connection with the McAlberts. (DA Michael “Meatball” Morrissey).
• Proctor did not solicit a gift for his wife in return for his arrest of Karen Read. (Proctor lied about it under oath until confronted with his own texts.)
• Glass on the bumper will match a cocktail glass from the bar. (More “sources.”)

Of course, Meatball Morrissey and his bent band of state police detectives may yet have another opportunity to explain themselves –in front of the federal grand jury that’s been all over this miscarriage of justice like white on rice almost from the very beginning.

Yesterday, just to add a little more melodrama to the closing arguments, three of the leading McAlberts decided to appear in court.

One was Jennifer McTooth, the hillbilly hag who google-searched “Hos long to die in cold” and then deleted the search.

But prosecutor Adam Lally had an explanation for that one in his closing yesterday.

“They were not ‘deleted’ by user,” he practically shouted at the jury. “That’s not what ‘deleted’ means?”

Then there was Colin Albert, the wannabe local thug, son of Jailbird Chris Albert. And finally, there was Brian Albert himself, the Boston police sergeant on whose lawn the body of his fellow officer John O’Keefe was found in January 2022.

Sitting facing the jury, Brian Albert’s body language was not good during defense lawyer Alan Jackson’s closing. His collar seemed to be getting a little tight.

For the record, here is what Sgt. Brian Albert has made from the Boston Police Department over the last three years, according to city payroll records.

In 2021, shortly before Officer O’Keefe’s body was found on his front lawn, Sgt. Albert made $244,664, including $78,795 in overtime.

In 2022, the year O’Keefe died, and Albert decided to sell the family home, get rid of the family dog and move out of town, he made $223,954, including $31,956 in injury pay.

In 2023, his pay included $156,400. That included $95,963 in injury pay and $60,464 in “other.”

Living well is the best revenge. That’s a motto to live by in most places. In Canton, where O’Keefe died, and where all the “McAlberts” live, they live by different words.

In Canton, living fat, drunk and stupid is the best revenge.

And an even better revenge is driving drunk in a state police cruiser and losing your gun and badge when you black out.

Lally seemed to be mailing it in during his hour-which-seemed-like-a-year, not that he was dealt a great hand of cards to begin with. Garbage in, garbage out.

His most memorable moment came when he mentioned her arrival back at John O’Keefe’s house she didn’t remove her shoes, as O’Keefe insisted upon.

“Why is it that the defendant has no issue with wearing shoes in the house when Mr. O’Keefe has that strict rule? Because she knows where he is! She knows he’s not coming home! She hit him with her SUV and left him with the snow!”

Yeah, that’s the ticket. That’s how you know she murdered him, because she didn’t take off her wet shoes.

And then, to cover her tracks, she then left 53 voice mails, most of them hysterical, for O’Keefe on his cell phone.

As for defense lawyer Alan Jackson, he had his theme. And it had nothing to do with shoes.

“Look the other way. Look the other way,” he began. “Four words that sum up the Commonwealth’s case. Four words that sum up the hoax of those who have tried to deceive you.”

Yes, but what about the deletions that aren’t deletions?

“Late night calls and google searches. Falsified affidavits, inverted videos, butt dials galore. Just look the other way!

“It’s not that it could happen. It’s that every single one of those things did happen.”

Then there was the breathtaking corruption of Trooper Michael Proctor, another low-rent Canton townie who will soon be separated from the State Police, better late than ever. Even the troopers’ union is backing off from their usual rabid support of every crooked cop.

The jury is six men and six women, and Trooper Proctor must be a particularly hard sell for them, given his astonishing misogyny, calling Karen Read the c-word with “no ass” and a “leaky balloon knot.”

Lally was at his most pathetic when he tried to explain away those appalling texts to his pals, both from his school and his crime career in the State Police.

“Those were from his private cell phone,” Lally explained, without adding that they were turned up by the FBI as part of its ongoing criminal investigation of the corruption in Norfolk County law enforcement. “He never thought they would see the light of day. They were in a safe space, a safe space for him to discuss, if you will.”

A safe space? And what was on his mind to discuss was… framing Karen Read.

Alan Jackson had a different take.

“They cannot distance themselves from the stench of him on this case and this investigation.”

He then elaborated:

“How did he approach his job, late at night in his office, deviously searching for naked pictures of Karen Read as if she’s a piece of meat, calling her vile names… And when he was done betraying that very humanity, he wished her to commit suicide. That, ladies and gentlemen, is how you frame somebody.

“That’s how you rip a person’s life apart and sleep like a baby at night while doing it.”

Jury deliberations continue. But this is only Act 1 of the John O’Keefe Murder Mystery.

Act 2 is already in show prep at the Moakley Courthouse on Northern Avenue in South Boston. The feds are coming for the Quincy hackerama.