On Election Day in Boston, normalcy too big an ask

The worst part is, no matter how blank I leave my bubbles, one of these candidates will win.

Whatever happened to normalcy?

It’s a question often I ask myself while navigating Boston neighborhoods, stepping aside to let a bearded woman pass or smiling cordially while the blue mohawk at the checkout counter assists me.

But at what point did the members of the fringe decide to band together and assume power? It’s Election Day, and normal candidates are few and far between, forcing us to settle for… anyone functional.

Take Boston’s District 9—Allston and Brighton—where I’ll be voting Tuesday in the municipal election. More accurately, I’ll be submitting a ballot with a circle or two filled out. While the at-large election features some glimmers of hope (Erin Murphy or, maybe, Bridget Nee-Walsh), in good conscience, I cannot vote for either City Council candidate running to oversee my jurisdiction.

On one hand, you have incumbent Liz Breadon, a predictable liberal lesbian of the Baby Boomer generation. Her focus is primarily “environmental justice,” which, in a metropolitan context, isn’t the worst thing to spend the bloated budget on—more trees, more green space, more playgrounds for kids (and, of course, fur babies).

Where Breadon went too far for me was when she resolved to end the sale of Guinea Pigs within city limits, citing a “surge” in forfeitures and strays. Meanwhile, Boston just landed the 13th spot in Orkin’s list of “rattiest cities” in the country, so it looks like Liz has her eyes set on the wrong four-legged critter.

Breadon’s fatal flaw was earning herself an endorsement from Planned Parenthood, proving a long-term lapse in, if not an absence of, moral judgement. A good, general rule of thumb? If Planned Parenthood endorses it, don’t do it. That goes for injecting minors with foreign hormones, dismembering the unborn, and voting for those who will perpetuate its sick and twisted lobby.

So, no, I won’t be casting my vote for Liz Breadon.

On the other hand, you have this fellow Jacob deBlecourt who makes Liz Breadon look like the good ol’ days of lunacy. Sure, Jacob seems like a nice enough guy to be on your work-night bar trivia team. For City Council, however, it’s a No from me.

“In a time when neo-nazis are marching in the streets and issuing bomb threats to gender-affirming hospitals,” deBlecourt shares on his site, “we need a City Council that is prepared to fight hard for Boston’s most marginalized communities.”

Jacob deBlecourt believes he derives some sort of ethos from the fact that he’s a “renter” and he’s “queer.” He also gained experience as a staffer under Boston City Councilor at Large Julia Mejia, also endorsed by Big Abortion and best-known for her public announcement that, no, she is not on drugs.

The candidate was almost redeemed when I glanced over his platform to address Boston’s rat population (“ratform”). But even that policy, which includes the appointment of a Rat Czar, was coated with the usual euphemisms: “sustainability” and “increased funding.” It foreshadows millions spent and no change in vermin activity.

I guess you can’t spell “bureaucrat” without…

DeBlecourt’s endorsements include that of Miss Trans Massachusetts 2023, Chelsea Page Moses.

Is Allston and Brighton’s large population of Orthodox Jews jazzed about their options? Has anyone asked the newcomer Catholics, fleeing Guatemala or Honduras or Ecuador, how they feel?

The worst part is, no matter how blank I leave my bubbles, one of these candidates will win.

On the bright side, neither of them is a criminal, which for the Boston City Council these days isn’t out of the question.

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