Gov. Healey’s policies full of donut holes

What is it with these pampered Massachusetts Democrats trying to pass themselves off as normal Americans?

Who are they kidding?

C’mon down, Gov. Maura Healey! It used to be said that patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.

Now, Dunkin’ is the last refuge of a scoundrel.

It’s been a week now since Healey last pandered to the demographic she considers the plebeians of Massachusetts – customers of Dunkin’ (formerly Donuts).

That was when she went on social media to try to explain her energy catastrophe in terms of munchkins, a performance so pathetic that she ended up as a national punchline.

This Dunkin’ brown-nosing by Maura has been going on for a while now, at least since the St. Patrick’s Day breakfast a couple of years ago. She wore a Dunkin’ tracksuit to Halitosis Hall, as did her plus-sized lieutenant governor.

It was a real knee-slapper – not.

More recently, she trolled federal HHS secretary Bobby Kennedy Jr. when he suggested maybe guzzling sugary iced coffee from Dunkin’ (or Starbucks) isn’t the healthiest way to start every morning.

Maura did fundraising off that faux outrage to Kennedy. Her implied message: I’m one of you, you filthy peasants! Okay, I guess it’s still a better pitch for Maura than bragging about killing the two natural-gas pipelines, or the $4 billion she squandered on foreign freeloader flophouses, or….

Last month, at a Democrat hackfest, one of the pinky-ring unions gave her a Dunkin’ travel mug – personalized.

You can see why she’s trying to attach herself to the state’s dominant doughnut chain. Most of the old local consumer staples are long gone, driven out of the state by her party’s insane fiscal policies over the decades.

Think Cape Cod Potato Chips. Just do it quickly, because they’re closing up in Hyannis in a couple of months.

Another thing: not everybody is enamored with Dunkin’, and not just for Bobby Kennedy health reasons either. Dunkin’ is fine, for what it is. I mean, I won’t turn down a munchkin, or an old-fashioned plain doughnut.

But are they as good as they used to be? I think not. There used to be a hack in Boston named “Doughnuts” Craven.

He got that moniker because he was so desperate to become a judge that he used to deliver a dozen doughnuts to Gov. Frank Sargent’s mansion in Dover every Sunday morning. Craven was groveling, begging to be given something, anything, that would support his family.

He needed a job, as opposed to work.

Sarge finally made him a court clerk, and it was left to Gov. Ed King to hand “Doughnuts” his early retirement on the juvenile court a few years later, where he served with Whitey Bulger’s youngest brother, a future felon named Jackie.

Back then, a dozen Dunkin’ Donuts were tastier. At least that’s how I remember them.

They were made on site, for one thing. They didn’t taste day-old.

Again, the new version is okay, if there’s nothing else, but nothing to write home about. I’ll take a Honey Dew over a Dunkin’ any time. Or a Market Basket, for that matter. Any of the independents are better than Dunkin’, usually much better.

That’s not to say I don’t still love getting the occasional $25 Dunkin’ gift card. Of course I always immediately re-gift it to one of my daughters, who starts every single morning with a large Dunkin’ coffee, which isn’t the best either.

After handing my daughter the gift card, I always lecture her that she could make yourself a lot better cup of coffee at home than she could ever get at Dunkin’, and for a fraction of the cost.

She just rolls her eyes and nods. She’s heard my lame rap so many times before. What does Dad know?

I bring this up only because I don’t think Maura knows that a lot of people she’s trying to suck up to are rather blase about Dunkin’. Its biggest advantage is that it’s on every corner. It’s the Bud Light of doughnuts.

But somebody must have told Maura that Dunkin’ is very popular with voters who were born and raised here, who have real jobs to which they commute daily, who drive their kids to school, who maybe buy them by the dozen for after-church events on Sunday, or for their children’s Little League teams….

In other words, the Dunkin’ crowd is the same people Maura Healey has absolutely zero connection to, in any way, just like every other Democrat in Massachusetts.

This Dunkin’ pandering by Maura is just the latest Democrat manifestation of what’s called “nostalgie de la boue,” which is defined as “a high-status individual’s attraction to low-life culture, crude experience or degradation.”

Remember Sen. Ed Markey after Tom Brady’s last Super Bowl win here? He went on the floor of the Senate to congratulate “the Boston Patriots.”

And then there was wind-surfing blue blood John Forbes Kerry, reading the baseball scores during the 2004 pennant race – “This just in! Detroit 2, Red Sox 5.”

Nothing says I’m a big baseball fan like reading the scores backwards like a tennis match.

Even Mike Dukakis tried to be a regular guy after Ed King defeated him for governor in 1978. He invited union thugs to his house, according to one old story, and then asked them if they wanted a “brew.”

They were shocked. Maybe the Duke was normal after all. A minute or so later, the Harvard uber-snob returned from the kitchen with one 12-ounce can of beer… and two glasses.

Democrats, stay in your lane, and it’s not the drive-through at Dunkin’. That’s where the Americans not. No Democrats need apply.

Maura and the rest of you trust-funded Democrat snots, go back to where you belong.

The polo field.