“Gisele” is trending on Twitter. And for once, it’s not Bündchen.
The Gisele in question is not the wife of Tom Brady but rather the wife of Pennsylvania’s U.S. Senate candidate, Lt. Gov. John Fetterman. Howie listeners know he’s sometimes called “Fetterneck” and elsewhere “Quasimodo” or “Sloth from The Goonies.” Since even liberal media outlets talk about his supposed “folkloric” stature, the smears on the LG’s looks can’t be far from the truth.
Fetterman is running a floundering campaign against heart-surgeon-turned-television-personality Dr. Mehmet Oz. His campaign has been hindered by a stroke severely affecting his ability to speak coherently. In recent days, however, Fetterman’s campaign has taken an even stranger turn.
Or, should I say, the Fettermans’ campaign. It appears Gisele Barreto Fetterman has joined the race and plans to make a name for herself in Washington.
They say that behind every hulking, incoherent, shaved-head man in a hoodie is a much smaller, politically savvy woman, right?
Now, with all this talk of folklore and fairy tales, you may think this claim is far-fetched. But recent events back up my theory.
First and foremost, I should note that Gisele Fetterman is verified on Twitter. She’s already been blue-checkmarked. Besides Pennsylvania, how many states have Second Ladies who are verified on Twitter?
None. I checked.
Last Wednesday, The Washington Post featured a story about this battleground Senate race. But it wasn’t a smear piece on Oz or a puff piece on the six-foot-eight Democrat. Instead, the column shined a light on dog-loving, thick-skinned Gisele Fetterman, who delivered her husband’s primary victory acceptance speech last May.
Throughout the summer, it was Gisele campaigning for her husband. “Keeping the seat warm for him,” she told NBC.
Today, Bloomberg also published a pro-Gisele piece that zeroes in on her family’s story as migrants from Rio de Janeiro. She may be merely an “activist” and “surrogate” for her husband now, but she’s the Democrats’ dream candidate. She checks even more PC boxes than her never-had-a-real job husband. Her political future is bright.
But most peculiar is the way Mrs. Fetterman handled her husband’s most recent campaign event. Yesterday Mr. Fetterman was joined by President Biden in Pennsylvania with Election Day less than three weeks out.
When a journalist asked the senatorial candidate a question, Gisele intervened: “We’re not doing interviews.” We?
When his wife wasn’t within three feet of him, Fetterman dodged another reporter by fleeing the building. Points for efficiency, I suppose.
Clueless Joe might have let the whole scheme slip in his speech, but of course, it could have just been another gaffe from the gaffe-master, so we may never know for sure.
“John, thank you very much for running,” Brandon had said earlier, in Pittsburgh. “And Gisele, you’re going to be a great, great lady in the Senate.”
As I said, we may never know for sure. But I suspect we’ll be seeing and hearing a lot more from the Mrs. if she…er, her husband…is elected to the Senate.