It’s Weekend at Biden’s, and Dementia Joe is already gearing up for the 2022 mid-term elections.
“I want to tell my Republican friends, Get ready, Bal!”
Does anyone know who this “Bal” person is? But the president continued calling Bal out:
“You’re gonna in for a problem!”
Remember that, Bal. Next year, you’re gonna in for a problem!
These are the words of Dementia Joe Biden, and all dialogue is guaranteed verbatim.
All quotes come from right here in the United States of America, or as Joe called it at one whistle-stop this week, “the United Steak of Amerifa for God’s sake.”
For God’s sake indeed. And have you checked the price of United Steaks lately? It’s all the fault of “the meat conglomerate,” as his flack, the gasoline-hair-colored Jen Psaki, explained.
But it’s not just the greedy meat conglomerate that’s been gouging Americans, or should I say Amerifans? Since Jan. 20, all the conglomerates that Trump somehow kept in check, with inflation almost nonexistent, have started reaping “windfall profits.”
The producer price index is up 9.6%, year over year. A “grim milestone” of 800,000 COVID deaths in the U.S. was reached this week, but none of Dementia Joe’s caregivers in the media even blinked an eye.
What a difference a year makes.
And now the president vows, yet again, to reduce the price of “prescription jugs,” which he also called “perstiption drugs.” Some of these jugs cost as much as $1,000 a dose, he said, even though they cost only “10 bucks to delep.”
Biden was one busy geezer this past week. He did a Zoom interview with a reputed comedian he called “Jim” Kimmel. He lauded the “Vicepresidentment” and her husband, whom he described both as the “First Gentleman” and as the “Second Gentleman.”
He talked a lot about his wife Jill — excuse me, “Dr.” Jill. Biden called her “an amazing first later lady uh I I don’t know how she does it.” He praised her as “scintillating,” which he pronounced as “sense-alating.”
“My wife Jill,” he said elsewhere, “is a first is a full-time teacher.”
He also found time to denounce autocracies, which he called “autocra-skies,” without elaborating whether they were Alpine or cross-country autocra-skies.
Biden was on the road this week, to Kansas City first and then to Kentucky, one of the states devastated by the tornadoes, or as he called the storm last weekend, a “hurricane.”
But help, he announced, is on the way to what he described as “the infected area.”
“A hundred and 44 thousand liters of drinking water, 24,000 meals uh you know uh uh I I just 74,000 and look thousands of cots and blankets look there are seven, seven shelters open in Kentucky which are now taking care of 300 occupants but a lot more is gonna open.”
That is a relief, no doubt.
You may have heard talk on television about something called “inflation.” Don’t worry, though, Joe assured the good people of Kansas City that help is on the way to your local gas station.
“The average price you’re paying here in Kansas City is below two dollars a gallon uh, three dollars a gallon it’s down to 2.90 a gallon, 20% down from cents for from uh a month ago.”
Would it surprise you to learn that Biden forgot the name of the mayor he was appearing with — “under the leadership of (pause) mayors like uh you know our mayor here.”
He channeled Joe Stalin as he spoke of the so-called election reform bill: “The struggle is no long just who gets to get or making it easier for eligible to vote, it’s about who gets to count the vote.”
And to keep counting, and counting, until the totals come out right. That way, Democrats can overcome the “elexive subversion,” as he put it, which is presumably the fault of Bal and the rest of the GOP.
Whatever ails Joe is, apparently contagious. He was joined at one point this week by House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, who is even older than Dementia Joe, and she too pushed for his outrageous BBB bill, summing it up thusly:
“The best two words to use are: It lowers cost.”
Two words? May we quote you on that? Madame Speaker. It reminds Joe’s fans of the day he mentioned his own favorite “three-letter word: jobs. J-O-B-S.”
Here are a few more of Dementia Joe’s Greatest Hits this week:
“They’re paying at higher tax rate than someone making a trillion dollars, I mean a billion dollars, for real.”
“And you qualified for federal aid you got ‘em just enough much of dam — of money money to get exactly what it looked like before.”
“You soul what you can soul, you don’t have the money to get it done, well my pan my plan addresses that.”
“I, I took 50 billion barrels, million barrels out outta the they call it the Oil Petroleum Reserve.”
“Nobel 17 Nobel winners of the ec-ec-ec-economics have written a letter.”
“So you know so Mom can, Grandmom can walk out without having ah ah out of her porch without fallin’, can take care of herself, can be left alone.”
Let’s close with Speaker Pelosi’s spoken Christmas, er holiday card to Dementia Joe:
“Mr. President it’s an honor and of course a pleasure to be here at this time of challenge and with the coronavirus the national insecurity for families and national disasters and what our country could not be more could not be better served than with this most experienced capable hands than yours, President Biden.”
She then added of Dementia Joe, “He’s just perfect. The timing couldn’t be better.”
Especially if you’re China, Russia, Iran or North Korea.
However, if you’re here in the United Steak of Amerifa, in 2022 you’re gonna in for a problem. At least if your name is Bal.