Inspired leadership?
Are those the first two words that come to your mind when you consider how Govs. Charlie Baker and Andrew Cuomo have handled their responsibilities this year?
You want two words that better describe these clueless buffoons? How about “unmitigated disasters”?
But on Wednesday night Dumb & Dumber picked up the Edward M. Kennedy Institute Awards for Inspired Leadership — sort of the winter Profiles in Courage awards.
So Baker and Cuomo are the gubernatorial cream of the crop? Can we get a second opinion from a different group — say, the National Association of Nursing Home residents?
Seriously, if these captains of calamity are the best we’ve got, who are the runners up? Newsom, Whitmer, Pritzker, Mills? And how about Gov. Phil Murphy of New Jersey, Tall Deval’s classmate at Needham High back in the mid-’70s?
They always say follow the data, so let’s look at some of the data on the winners’ “inspired leadership”:
Deaths per 100,000: N.Y. second with 181, Mass. third with 161. (N.J. tops with 196 — Needham High rules!)
Deaths in nursing homes per 1,000 (Like the above, these numbers are from Statista, and may be skewed by the fact that N.Y. in May began trying to cover up Cuomo’s disastrous decisions by changing the way it records nursing home deaths.): Mass at No. 1 with 125.1, N.J. second with 120.1 and N.Y. twentieth with 50.5.
Are you inspired yet? Let’s go to the most recent unemployment numbers, per Bureau of Labor Statistics: N.Y. third, 9.6%; Mass. 12th 7.4%.
Those Bay State numbers will probably look even worse when the next monthly chart comes out — last week in the seven-day numbers, Mass. had jumped back up to sixth. Inspirational!
Again, these awards are from Ted Kennedy’s “institute,” the key piece of which is an “immersion unit” — immersion in the Senate, supposedly, not a tidal pond on Martha’s Vineyard. Given who the awards are named after, though, the blood on the recipients’ hands seems more than appropriate.
As Mollie Hemingway of The Federalist tweeted: “Everyone is upset about this, but I assume, given who it’s named after, that this is an award for killing people and getting away with it.”
Janice Dean, the Fox News meteorologist who lost both her in-laws in Cuomo’s death houses this year, tweeted: “Forgive me but seeing the governor of New York accept awards for his leadership that helped kill thousands of seniors has me a bit cranky this morning.”
In his own tweet, Cuomo said he was “honored” to receive the Teddy.
“I learned about humanity, leadership and putting people first from the great Senator Ted Kennedy.”
Putting people first — unless they’re named Mary Jo Kopechne.
Actually, Cuomo did learn a lot from the Kennedys. He was married to one of them for a while — Bobby’s daughter, Kerry. Their marriage broke up when she started running around with a polo player — feel free to google this, along with the name Robert Kennedy Jr., her brother, and the New York Post, the paper that chronicled all the hanky-panky going on among these Beautiful People.
It makes for inspirational reading.
After Kerry Cuomo’s marriage broke up, not to mention her liaison with the polo player, she wrote a book because that’s what Kennedys do now.
The book’s title: Being Catholic Now.
Yep, I think that given her romantic history, Mrs. Cuomo was well-qualified indeed to discuss being Catholic now.
In the press release, the Kennedys said it wasn’t just the governors’, uh, special handling of the Panic that won these two clowns their awards. They’ve presided over multiple other fiascoes and scandals.
Who can forget Charlie Parker (as Biden calls him) doing such a bang-up job with the Registry of Motor Vehicles, the State Police, the DCF, not to mention trying to triple the state gas tax with no legislative approval, banning menthol cigarettes, going after churches while allowing casinos to run wide open, etc., etc.
As for Cuomo, well, what about his sad Smothers Brothers-style routine with his ridiculous brother Fredo. Or his begging the rich to return to N.Y. a couple of months back, and now saying he’s going to raise taxes on them $8.7 billion to make up for his own destruction of the state economy.
And don’t forget “the third Cuomo brother.” His name is Joseph Percoco and after his bribery and fraud convictions he’s in the federal pen in Otisville, N.Y., until April 2024. His BOP number is 78132-054.
More inspiration!
Still, if I were Phil Murphy down in Trenton, I’d be disconsolate. He’s devastated the Garden State at least as much as Parker and Cuomo have wrecked their states.
Don’t worry, Phil, spring is coming — and so is the next Profiles in Courage Award. Nancy Pelosi won last year, even before she stonewalled the $2 trillion relief package in a successful attempt to screw the middle classes before the election. (Just ask Bernie Sanders.)
Big shoes to fill Murph, but if anyone can do it, it’s you. Always remember, Needham High rules!