I predicted at the end of last year that media coverage would somehow get more ridiculous in 2023.
Unfortunately, this has proven to be the case. While some things—like Trump’s permanently imminent walls-are-closing-in, noose-is-tightening demise—have not changed, others certainly have. This year has given us four Trump indictments, three Chinese spy balloons, two new US House Speakers, and one additional acknowledged Biden grandchild.
I have compiled Fake News both serious and silly from throughout 2023 to show the scandalous side of our media: those eager to twist the truth, push woke propaganda, and cover up Biden corruption.
WE WANT THE TRUMP
He’s done! No, for real this time!
After eight years of the same old song and dance, you would think the mainstream media would evict President Trump from his home—that is, living rent-free in their minds. But as they say, insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
JANUARY: The Real Lesson of the Speaker Chaos Is That Trump Is Finished in the GOP | JASON NICHOLS – Newsweek
FEBRUARY: Trump’s bluffing days are done | KEITH NAUGHTON – The Hill
MARCH: America May Finally Be Done with Donald Trump | JAMES RISEN – The Intercept
APRIL: It’s not that complicated. Donald Trump is done | ANDREW COHEN – Ottawa Citizen
MAY: Trump’s Dominance in the GOP Isn’t What It Seems | JULIA AZARI – Politico
JUNE: Donald Trump is doomed. Finally | ANDREW MITROVICA – Al Jazeera
JULY: Sununu says ‘crybaby’ Trump won’t concede after he loses GOP primary | DOMINICK MASTRANGELO – The Hill
AUGUST: Trump’s Toast, Folks | CLARK NEILY – Cato Institute
SEPTEMBER: Paul Ryan Predicts Exactly When And How Trump’s 2024 Run Could Be Doomed | LEE MORAN – HuffPost
OCTOBER: Christie says Trump will be convicted in slew of legal battles: ‘It’s over’ | MIRANDA NAZARRO – The Hill
NOVEMBER: Donald Trump Is ‘Done’ After Jenna Ellis Plea Deal Interview | EWAN PALMER – Newsweek
DECEMBER: Donald Trump’s “Dictator” Promise Is No Joke | MOLLY JONG-FAST – Vanity Fair
THE BEST WOMEN, IT TURNS OUT, ARE MEN
Now, journalists are not biologists, so I suppose not even a Pulitzer Prize winner can determine if the broad-shouldered beauty is a dude or the cyclist hours ahead of the others is not a femme.
Kidding aside, the most egregious flavor of Fake News spews from the radical transgender ideologues, and we can only hope 2024 sees a reversal of this societal contagion.
Dylan Mulvaney Wins Woman of the Year Award | MATTHEW IMPELLI – Newsweek
Trans cyclists take gold and silver in Chicago women’s races | MELISSA KOENIG – The New York Post
Transgender cyclists once again take gold and silver at major female competition: ‘Outrageous’ | MELISSA KOENIG – The New York Post
Miss Netherlands contestant makes history as first trans woman to win the pageant | JACQUI PALUMBO – CNN
Flight attendant makes history as first trans woman to be crowned Miss Portugal | MAGGIE BASKA – PinkNews
BIDEN IS GOOD. BIDEN IS GREAT! PAY NO ATTENTION TO HIS MENTAL STATE.
Rations are up. The president’s energy is inspiring. And, frankly, a more fatherly father has never existed.
Repeat these three mantras daily, and you are on your way to earning a White House press pass. Just make sure to overlook any unidentifiable white powder or shirtless drag queens. This is the era of decency, folks!
Bidenomics Is Real Economics | NICK HANAUER – TIME
‘Bidenomics’ is working – which means Biden and the Democrats may win too | ROBERT REICH – The Guardian
Biden is ‘healthy’ and ‘vigorous,’ White House doctor says | MYAH WARD – Politico
What Does “Energetic” Joe Biden Love to Eat? “Think Beige” for the Moderate Pres. | GRACE RUSSO BULLARO – La Voce di New York
Hunter Biden Chokes Up As He Torches Republicans For Turning ‘The Light of My Dad’s Love’ Against Him | TOMMY CHRISTOPHER – Mediaite
REDACT, REWRITE, RINSE, REPEAT
As much as we readers may try, we will likely never know what really happened in the days leading up to the strike on a Gaza hospital and its subsequent coverage. And remember White House cocaine-gate? Looks like the West Wing surveillance cameras were as good as the ones in Jeffery Epstein’s New York jail cell.
Closer to home, Boston-area residents are still waiting on transparency regarding the four children taken into state custody after everything was, allegedly, a-okay. And will we ever know the names of the Cambridge and Watertown brothels’ johns?
Editors’ Note: Gaza Hospital Coverage | The New York Times
Secret Service ends White House cocaine investigation with no lead | KELLY O’DONNELL & REBECCA SHABAD – NBC News
Wu disputes ‘house of horrors’ rumors after body found in Southie apartment | MORGAN ROUSSEAU – Boston.com
When will prosecutors say who patronized ‘high-end’ brothel in Mass.? | OSCAR MARGAIN – NBC Boston
2023’s PUFFIEST PUFF PIECES
While poking fun at the sweethearts of South Bend has never been easier, it requires a certain skill set to place either Buttigieg—Pete or Chasten—that high on a pedestal. While Pete’s “cathedral mind” puff piece comes out (no pun intended) on top this year, close behind the Transportation Secretary are features on “Feisty Joe” and “realist” KJP.
Pete Buttigieg loves God, beer, and his electric Mustang | VIRGINIA HEFFERNAN – Wired
Chasten Buttigieg Has Grown Up. So Has His Hometown. | ADAM WREN – Politico
White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre Has Made History—And Waves | MATTIE KAHN – Vogue
Feisty Joe Biden Is Back | RONALD BROWNSTEIN – The Atlantic
TIME Person of the Year: Taylor Swift | SAM LANSKY – TIME
HOW THE FAKE NEWS IS REALLY FARING
Despite President Biden’s unceasing economic victories, the American media were no match for the global democratic recession.
Some of Feisty Joe’s biggest supporters—Democrat operatives with press passes—did not do too well in 2023. Of course, the cause of massive layoffs at the billionaire-owned Washington Post or tabloid-y publications like BuzzFeed and Vice will be blamed on Putin, a pipeline, or Trump.
BuzzFeed News To Shut Down As Digital Media Company Cuts Workforce By 15% | TED JOHNSON & DADE HAYES – Deadline
Jezebel to Be Resurrected by Paste Magazine | KATIE ROBERTSON – The New York Times
Google cuts dozens of jobs in news division | JENNIFER ELIAS – CNBC
Washington Post will offer buyouts to cut staff by 240 | WILL SOMMER & ELAHE IZADI – The Washington Post
Vice to end several news shows and lay off dozens of staffers in hollowing out of news division | LIAM REILLY – CNN
As we head into a general election year, we must brace ourselves for more quality journalism on Biden’s beige culinary palette, Trump-is-done clickbait, and inaccurate geopolitical reports. Oh, and remember, Democracy could die at any moment!
Plus, if you believe what the Climate Cult subscribers say, we only have seven—or is it twenty-seven—years on planet Earth before…something happens.
When that something does happen, I can only hope another glimpse into Pete Buttigieg’s “voluminous mind” rises from the rubble.
Here’s to 2024!