Actually, every single bad Democrat move is Trump’s fault!

If Donald Trump didn’t exist, corrupt Democrats would have had to invent him.

A year out of office, he remains the Great Satan, the world’s worst person, forever responsible for everything bad that ever happens to them, including getting their hands caught in the cookie jar.

Just ask Marilyn Mosby, the newly indicted state’s attorney in Baltimore, the pride of Dorchester and a METCO graduate of both Dover-Sherborn High School and Boston College Law School.

She was just charged by a federal grand jury with perjury and lying on bank-loan applications for her two vacation properties in Florida.

The crusading woke prosecutor was indicted for allegedly lying about a lien the IRS had placed on her property for $45,022 in unpaid taxes. (Stop me if you’ve heard this one before about a Democrat politician.)

She’s also accused of falsely certifying that the recent virus caused her financial damage, which allowed her to dip into her retirement funds without penalty. In fact, when she was claiming hardship in 2020, under oath, she pocketed $247,955.58, which was an increase from the $238,772.04 she banked in 2019.

It’s a federal rap, and the U.S. attorney is a Black Democrat, a former Maryland legislator who works for a rabid partisan Democrat named Merrick Garland, who works for Dementia Joe Biden, who is … a Democrat.

But guess who this loyal Democrat is blaming for her alleged sticky fingers?

“Donald Trump called for me to be prosecuted several years ago,” she thundered on Friday, “and I fought back against his administration.”

Huh? Madam, are you saying that the same DOJ that spent years trying to frame POTUS on utterly bogus charges has now indicted you – at the behest of this very same guy the G-men were willing to commit felonies against in order to railroad him into prison?

Is there anything Donald Trump can’t do? Is there any bad act anywhere anytime that cannot be blamed on Orange Man Bad?

The background of this latest outburst of Trump Derangement Syndrome goes back to 2015 (before Trump became president). A Black drug dealer named Freddie Gray died in Baltimore police custody after being injured in a city van that was taking him to jail after his latest arrest.

Much evidence indicated Gray had hurt himself, but after the traditional community fest of looting, shooting and arson, Mosby sensed a political opportunity. She screeched police brutality and indicted six city cops, three of whom were Black and one of whom was a woman.

It was an outrageous overreach, and after her first prosecutions were laughed out of court, she dropped all charges. The cops all got their jobs back.

This happened in 2016. Candidate Trump was campaigning at one of his golf clubs in Florida and a reporter asked him about the big story of the day — Mosby’s frame job on the cops falling apart.

“I think she ought to prosecute herself,” Trump said. And that was it. He answered a question.

And now, almost six years later, she blames Trump for her indictment … by her fellow Black Democrats.

After Trump, she blamed the Republican governor (whom Trump loathes). Then she attacked the Fraternal Order of Police (for objecting to the attempted framing of their members).

And naturally “the right-wing media” had to be mentioned. She threw in every cliche in the Democrat playbook — “frivolous” charges, death threats, onerous legal bills, 24-hour security, etc. etc.

Victim, thy name is Marilyn Mosby.

“I fought back,” she continued, “against the same U.S. attorney’s office that is charging me now when they warned me not to charge the police in the Freddie Gray case.”

So in 2015 Obama’s Justice Department warned her not to indict innocent cops? How dare they! Her fellow Black Democrats were after her in 2015, and they’re still after her today.

How the hell does Donald Trump keep getting away with using Democrats to further his vast right-wing conspiracies?

It wouldn’t be a proper clown car, though, without a cameo appearance by Kamala Harris. So this is what the indicted state’s attorney once had to say about her BFF Cacklin’ Kamala.

“There would be no Marilyn Mosby without Kamala Harris. When I won state’s attorney, Kamala was my inspiration.”

You can’t make this stuff up.

“On a personal note,” Mosby continued, “she has inspired Black women like me to run for office.”

Kamala even threw a fundraiser for the dodgy Dorchester Democrat in 2017, at which time she presciently said that Mosby had to be reelected “to not only get convictions, but to have convictions.”

Convictions. Indeed.

Given her local background, the tawdry Marilyn Mosby saga would not be complete without a slobbering puff piece or two from The Boston Globe.

The headline on this triple-bylined hagiography from 2015 was “Baltimore prosecutor’s zest for justice began in Boston.”

Her mom, a former Boston police officer whom the Globe says gave birth to Marilyn when she was 17, was brought on stage to gush, “I can’t stop crying with pride. She is a hero not only to me but, right now, to the world.”

You could say Marilyn Mosby is a greater role model for the community than, pick a name … Dianne Wilkerson. Maybe bigger even than Monica Cannon-Grant, and you don’t get any higher than in the Globe pantheon than Mrs. Clark Grant, and when is his next court appearance, by the way?

One of the crack Globe scribes tracked down a cousin of Marilyn’s named Poncho Kincade, who said he was shaving when he heard on the radio that she had indicted those six innocent cops.

“I was like, ‘Oh my goodness.’ Everyone that knows her is so proud.”

Oddly, the Globe didn’t run any statements yesterday from Mom or Poncho about the pride they feel about darling Marilyn.

When the Globe finally does an update on their heroine, I hope they ask her kin how that “zest for justice” is working out for Marilyn now.

Askin’ for a friend. He lives at a place called Mar-a-Lago.

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