See if you can guess the winner of this hack job
Another day, another nationwide search at the State House.
First, it was Lt. Gov. Karyn Polito’s sister-in-law, but it’s not like she isn’t qualified for the appeals court. Her husband, the brother of Mr. Karyn Polito, donated $500 to both his sister-in-law and her boss, Gov. Tall Deval Baker in 2016.
Plus, Judge Kathryn Hand has the ultimate qualification for getting a hack judgeship in Massachusetts – she was born in New York.
But let’s talk about the next nationwide search. It involves the Creedons – and as a matter of fact, I will predict the winner of this nationwide search even as it’s just beginning.
The winner will be … Patrick Creedon.
Does that name Creedon ring a bell – in Brockton, the City of Champions, the Creedons are the champion hacks. Bob Creedon, age 76, is the $155,084-a-year elected clerk of courts in Plymouth County. He used to be the state senator, succeeding his brother, Mike, a former state rep, who got a state judgeship from which he had to, uh, resign in 2016 after being accused of making certain untoward remarks.
Mike Creedon is now retired. His state pension is $120,161 – that works out to a kiss in the mail of $10,000 a month.
Bob is married to Geraldine Creedon. She used to be the state rep in the district her brother-in-law represented in the General Court. She’s retired now too, with a $33,738-a-year pension.
Brother Brian Creedon is 68, but he’s still interred at the Brockton water department for $107,942.20 a year. Then there’s brother Kevin, clerk magistrate of the Brockton District Court for $155,084 a year. He has a son by the name of Patrick, and now we’re getting to the tangled web of this nationwide search.
Patrick Creedon is employed by his Uncle Bob Creedon, as an assistant clerk magistrate, for $119,415 a year. Creedons being Creedons, it would seem only appropriate that nephew Pat succeed his uncle, just like his Uncle Bob was succeeded in the House by Uncle Mike, and then Aunt Geraldine, and then Uncle Bob succeeded Uncle Mike in the state Senate.
But there’s a problem – county clerk of courts is an elective position, and Patrick isn’t exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer, even by Creedon standards. The best way to get him the sinecure would be for Uncle Bob to retire, mid-term, and then have Pat succeed him. That way, when they have the special election, Patrick would be the incumbent. He would be almost impossible to defeat.
The problem is, if Bob retires midterm, by law the job is automatically filled by the first assistant clerk, who must be a lawyer.
And therein lies the rub. Patrick struggled mightily to pass that pesky bar exam.
He took it in February 2013 – and failed.
He took it again in July 2013 – and flunked.
He took it again in February 2014 – and flunked.
He took it again in February 2015 – and flunked.
He took it again in February 2016 – and flunked.
The sixth time was the charm for Patrick – he finally passed, in February 2017.
But there was another problem – while Patrick was flunking the bar exam five times, the first assistant’s job had opened up, and Uncle Bob had put in this guy named Adam Baler. Baler’s hack credentials were impeccable as well – his dad Gregory had spent his entire life with his snout buried in the trough, and is now a retired judge with a pension of $87,667 a year. It was time to get rid of Baler – by promoting him. So Tall Deval has handed him the $155,084 job as clerk magistrate of the Plymouth District Court.
So now the first assistant’s job in Uncle Bob’s office is vacant, and the replacement must be picked by the Supreme Judicial Court. I asked the SJC how many payroll patriots had applied, their names and when Patrick Creedon will be selected. They sent me some boilerplate about the process.
Multiple calls this week to both Uncle Bob Creedon and Nephew Pat have gone unreturned. Thursday, I called one final time. Bob wasn’t in, and I was told Patrick was at the Plymouth courthouse. I called Plymouth and asked for Patrick.
“He hasn’t made his way in yet.” It was 11 o’clock.
If there was ever any doubt in my mind about who was going to be the next first assistant clerk, that removed it. Who else could the SJC give the $129,495-a-year hack job to – it’s professional courtesy in the hackerama.