Latest state pol nabbed for OUI

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And now, the latest inductee into the State House Alcohol of Fame: Sen. Michael Brady, D-Joe Angelo’s Café in Brockton.

Brady got a bad ice cube on his way home Friday night. He was pulled over in Weymouth at around 2:30 a.m. shortly after he swerved into the parking lot of John’s Liquor, apparently in the mistaken belief that the packy was still open.

It was at this point that the inevitable fate of so many Massachusetts statesmen finally happened to Sen. Brady.

The cops handcuffed him and put him in the back of a police car, at which time, as the arresting officer put it, “during the transport back to the station, my cruiser was filled with a strong alcoholic beverage scent.”

In other words, it smelled like the State House.

Now the extinguished solon has checked into rehab – the last refuge of a scoundrel. He plans to spend a week there – only a week? As a solon, he opined in the traditional statement his office issued yesterday, he’s held to a “higher standard.”

Higher standard? C’mon, Senator, we’ve all seen the videotape of you at karaoke night at Chang Chun’s. Do you enjoy the Mai Tais there, Senator? Do you like it when they put the little parasol in your cocktail?

If they ever make a movie about Sen. Brady, for a soundtrack they can use the old country song: “Was it the high cost of living, or the cost of living high?”

I think we know the answer. Just look at his red face.

Even by the below-average standards of the Massachusetts legislature, Brady checks in at far below average. His educational background: Massasoit Community College ’82, Metropolitan Life Insurance School ’93.

He used to have a hack job at the state lottery – you’re not surprised, are you? Ironic, though, considering that the boss of the state lottery used to be State Treasurer Shannon O’Brien, and her husband, then-State Rep. Emmet Hayes, was himself once lugged for OUI in Weymouth.

Weymouth – think of it as the Bermuda Triangle for impaired Plymouth County hacks.

The Weymouth PD police report was written by Officer Christopher Dangelo, who describes the solon at the time of the stop as having “a blank stare on his face also described as the 1000-yard stare.”

The 1000-yard stare? Also known as “the Massachusetts state legislator stare.”

You’ve seen “the stare” before. Think Brian Dempsey, Teddy Alexio, Denis McKenna, Paul Kujowski….

Another one who had “the stare” – Sen. Anthony Galluccio of Cambridge. Remember him? He claimed he was framed by the high alcohol-content of his toothpaste. Maybe that’s how you can beat the rap, Sen. Brady.

Tell the judge you had just brushed your teeth… with Arm and Hammered. Or Michelob Ultra Brite. Or Pepsobent. Or Tom Collins of Maine….

Sen. Brady, by the way, is the chairman of the Committee on Taxation. This may explain at least some of his problems in the sidewalk Olympics on Main Street in Weymouth early Saturday morning.

“(Sen. Brady) could not maintain a proper count (slurring numbers together).”

I have a feeling Mistah Chairman has the same problem on those rare occasions when he’s not impaired. Apparently he never got the memo: Drinkin’ doubles don’t make a party.

Brady claimed he was at a “work event” in Boston. Like he knows a lot about working. He got his Senate seat in a fixed special election – it was held the same day as a contested mayoral race in Brockton. The surrounding Republican towns had no other elections, and with a huge turnout in the rotten borough of Brockton Brady swamped Rep. Geoff Diehl of Whitman.

Brady’s hometown, Brockton, has a long history of pols who are a little rough around the edges, shall we say. Take Mike Creedon of the Creedon “dynasty” – please. He got forced off the bench a couple of years ago for some untoward remarks in his chambers, but before that Mike Creedon served as both a senator and a rep.

When he was in the House, Mike Creedon liked to have a road brew on the way back to the City of Champions. So he had a driver – another Brockton state rep, Mark Lawton, who also eventually became a judge. (Lawton’s son, by the way, got a hack job as a probation officer – remember how he was arrested in a Taunton drug dealer’s driveway? Brockton’s political establishment seems to be going downhill fast, much like the city itself.)

Brady, though, figured he didn’t need a chauffeur, no matter how legless he was in that crappy car of his. (“It looks like something a OUI driver would own,” one of the solon’s acquaintances said yesterday.)

Finally, as it dawned on Brady that he was headed to the clink, he did what they all do just before they’re advised of their Miranda rights.

“At this time BRADY handed me a Commonwealth of Massachusetts identification card and stated he was a State Senator.”

In other words, “Do you know who I am?”

Look on the bright side, Senator. At least they didn’t charge you with impersonating a Kennedy.

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